Asymmetrical Decency

September 13, 2025

[I will host a Substack livestream on Saturday morning at 8:00 a.m. Pacific / 11:00 a.m. Eastern. I will send a reminder on Saturday morning with instructions on how to tune in.]

Given the positive reaction to yesterday’s newsletter, which took a step back from the ugliness in the news, I am sending a short(ish) note to ease into the weekend.

I am hearing from many readers that the past few days have been especially punishing to their emotional and mental health. The tragic news of the murder of Charlie Kirk was compounded by the President of the United States blaming the “lunatic left” for the killing, even before the suspect had been identified or captured.

A suspect was arrested on Friday, September 12, 2025.

As Republican Utah Governor Spencer Cox said of the suspect, “[He] was one of us.”

Cox’s statement has garnered criticism because the Utah governor also said he “prayed” that the killer “was somebody from another state or another country.”

Instead, the suspect is a straight white male from a Republican household in Utah—attributes that contradict Trump's “lunatic left” narrative.

The cultural background of the suspected killer has momentarily subdued the “anti-left” rhetoric from some who sought to blame Democrats collectively for Kirk’s killing.

The last 48 hours have been difficult for Democrats and grassroots activists as right-wing politicians and media sought to censor liberal and progressive commentators who criticized Charlie Kirk’s views in any way.

A variety of journalists, academics, commentators, public employees, and military personnel have been fired or suspended for criticizing Kirk after his death, or for seeking to draw a connection between his views and his murder. See e.g., MSN/WaPo, Workers are getting fired, placed on leave over Charlie Kirk posts.

Some who have been “cancelled” or terminated were criticizing Kirk’s views, not condoning the violence against him. See, e.g., Argus Leader Sioux Falls, South Dakota professor faces termination from SDBOR over Charlie Kirk social media posts

The movement to censor commentary about Kirk after his tragic killing highlights one reason why many Democrats are feeling under siege in this fraught moment.

We are experiencing an asymmetrical demand that people react with decency and decorum to the tragic, unforgivable killing of Charlie Kirk—decency and decorum that were missing after acts of violence directed at Democrats.

To be clear, I am not suggesting that prior objectionable behavior by Republicans justifies insensitive comments about Charlie Kirk or his killing. To the contrary, I am asserting that all acts of political violence should evoke the same level of decency, humanity, and empathy for the victim.

Many of those now calling for dignity and respect in discussing Charlie Kirk’s killing exhibited callousness and juvenile cruelty in reacting to the attack on Nancy Pelosi’s husband, Paul Pelosi. See NYTimes, (11/5/2022), How Republicans Fed a Misinformation Loop About the Pelosi Attack.

The New York Times article lists 21 prominent Republicans who mocked the attack or promoted false rumors about the circumstances, including that the attack was perpetrated by a gay prostitute hired by Paul Pelosi. That false narrative was disproven within hours of the attack, but Republicans delighted in repeating the rumor or implying that authorities were covering up the facts surrounding the attack.

Republicans who engaged in those cruel and indecent attacks include Pete Hegseth, Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Tucker Carlson, Elon Musk, and Devin Nunes.

Pete Hegseth is now leading an effort by the Pentagon to punish any members of the military or civilian employees of the Department of Defense who make comments on social media that “celebrate or mock” the killing of Kirk. See USA Today, Marine fired over Charlie Kirk post, Pentagon says 'zero tolerance'.

Good. We should not have public servants who “celebrate or mock” acts of political violence. But that same standard should have been applied to Hegseth, Cruz, Trump, Musk, Greene, et al., when they were peddling slanderous, baseless theories about the brutal attack on Paul Pelosi.

I am not foolish enough to believe that Trump's acolytes will ever comport themselves with the same decency and humanity they are now imposing on Democrats.

I am making a simple point: One reason we are feeling emotionally exhausted at this moment is that we are rightly being expected to be the adults in the room during a difficult time. And the people who are most vociferous in enforcing those expectations have not and will not hold themselves to the same level of decency and humanity that they are demanding of Democrats.

That feels bad. It is unfair and hypocritical.

And yet, we should not begrudge or resent any call that we act with decency and humanity in the face of political violence.

Republicans are demanding that we comport ourselves with standards of decency and humanity that they refuse to meet.

Challenge accepted.

Gladly.

Opportunity for Reader Engagement

Join Focus for Democracy for a briefing on the midterm elections!

This coming Tuesday, September 16, at 5 PM PT/8 PM ET, Focus for Democracy will be kicking off its 2026 midterm events, including a briefing on the state of the gerrymandering battle.

The 2026 midterms will be pivotal for the future of our democracy. The threats are real, and the stakes could not be higher. Join Focus for Democracy on Zoom to learn how you can have the biggest impact on key races... now.

Tuesday, September 16

5 PM PT/8 PM ET

Register at this link.

Concluding Thoughts

Resistance to Trump's threats to send the National Guard to Chicago appears to have worked!

Although ICE agents are swarming in Chicago, Trump has not sent the National Guard to the Democratic stronghold in Illinois. Instead, he will “send” the National Guard to Memphis, Tennessee, at the invitation of Republican Governor Bill Lee. See Fox News, Trump pivots, will send National Guard to Memphis instead of Chicago

To be clear, there is no need to deploy the National Guard in Memphis. But deploying the Tennessee National Guard to Memphis will likely leave the Guard under state control—rather than the control of the Pentagon or Trump.

Trump changed plans because Chicago’s citizens and the governor of Illinois objected strenuously to the deployment. This success provides a model for future resistance. Most importantly, it shows that we can defeat Trump if we act together. That is a good lesson for the weekend.

Stay strong!

See you on the Substack livestream on Saturday morning, 8:00 a.m. Pacific / 11:00 a.m. Eastern.

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